Ash 37...I now pronounce you...

So. Today was Wednesday. Wednesday's are always days that I feel quite attacked emotionally. But I think I survived this one ok. I found out that one of my super good friends got engaged. That makes yet another one of my friends leaving the single world forever. For some reason all these recent engagements/weddings/fallings in love, just make me more resolved that marriage and all it entails is just not for me. I have gone from jaded to entertaining the idea to basically where I am today--disregard. It's hard though cause I love my friends and I'm excited for them, but I just don't see it ending out really all that positive in my own life. The thing that the all say to me is "Oh Ashley, I know you'll get married". I usually ask how they know that and I havn't really heard a good answer--at least not one that I can remember. I've decided though that if I don't get married, then I can't live in this duel-partnership environment. I'd have to go and live with some weird tribe or live in some liberal European country. I'm not afraid of being alone. I've thought long and hard about this and I'm mostly just afraid of the pity and condemnation that will come, even unintentionally, from my friends and family if I never get married. With that said, congratulations to all my friends who have recently "fallen" in love, or have gotten engaged, or are getting married this summer. Congratulations on finding someone with whom you think it'll make it easier to walk this world with rather than being by yourself. Jesus bless you overwhelmingly as you love Him through your relationships. Yeah. Rock on. (lol)