Ash...
"If God had wanted me otherwise, He would have created me otherwise." ~ Johann von Goethe
Today I felt satisfied with who I really am. With the real, true Ashley Lynn. I bite my lip as I say this but I actually am so glad that God brought me here to dog-sit. As a result I get to take him (Logan the dog) for walks at a truly beautiful place during my 2 favorite times of the day--dawn and dusk. The place is this dirt road on the outskirts of the city. This road runs parallel about 15 feet from the #2 highway on my left and about 15 feet from the fields on my right. As I walked there today, Jesus revealed something so transforming to me. All my life I've tried to figure out where I belong and who I really am--Do I belong on that side of the road or that side of the road? What am I really good at? Who am I really? It has always been a source of frustration for me to not be really good at one thing, but rather just kinda-good at alot of things. Everybody in high school had their one great talent that they were fantastic at and clearly defined who they were whilst I was more of just a collection of mismatched pieces. A dissapointed collection, because I wanted to be noticed for being something. Today on that road I realized that that's really who I am. To the glory of God I am a mismatch of kinda-good pieces, that all come together to form something fabulous. Today I am satisfied with being a walking contradiction--I am a city-girl and a country-girl. Drop me into the middle of New York City and me and my map will figure it out. Throw me into the Congalese jungle and me and my ninja senses will do the same. I am emotional and logical. I feel as comfortable sitting in a mansion as I do sitting with a homeless person. I love to travel--whether to Germany or to Safeway. I am so not funny and hysterically funny all at the same time. I am so simple and yet strangly complex. I could live in a tent on a mountain, or in the heart of the inner-city and still love where I am. I am organized and super-messy. I love planning and spontaneous adventure. I am a writer, an artist, a dancer and a dreamer. I love early mornings, late nights, being with friends and being alone. I am beautiful.
I have not already been made perfect, as Philippians 3 says, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. With joy and overwhelming peace I echo 1 Corinthians 15, "By the grace of God I, Ashley Lynn, am what I am." I rebuke the lies that attempt to trip me, confuse me, and kill me. I throw off the expectations that tell me who I am supposed to be and how I am supposed to act. I put on reckless abandonment to be whom Jesus calls His beloved. I am fully satisfied in my identity in Jesus and I hunger and long to have more and more of Him in my life that I might become more and more who He created me to be.
"In the world to come, I shall not be asked, 'Why were you not Moses', I shall be asked, 'Why were you not Zusya?'" ~Rabbi Zusya
Today I felt satisfied with who I really am. With the real, true Ashley Lynn. I bite my lip as I say this but I actually am so glad that God brought me here to dog-sit. As a result I get to take him (Logan the dog) for walks at a truly beautiful place during my 2 favorite times of the day--dawn and dusk. The place is this dirt road on the outskirts of the city. This road runs parallel about 15 feet from the #2 highway on my left and about 15 feet from the fields on my right. As I walked there today, Jesus revealed something so transforming to me. All my life I've tried to figure out where I belong and who I really am--Do I belong on that side of the road or that side of the road? What am I really good at? Who am I really? It has always been a source of frustration for me to not be really good at one thing, but rather just kinda-good at alot of things. Everybody in high school had their one great talent that they were fantastic at and clearly defined who they were whilst I was more of just a collection of mismatched pieces. A dissapointed collection, because I wanted to be noticed for being something. Today on that road I realized that that's really who I am. To the glory of God I am a mismatch of kinda-good pieces, that all come together to form something fabulous. Today I am satisfied with being a walking contradiction--I am a city-girl and a country-girl. Drop me into the middle of New York City and me and my map will figure it out. Throw me into the Congalese jungle and me and my ninja senses will do the same. I am emotional and logical. I feel as comfortable sitting in a mansion as I do sitting with a homeless person. I love to travel--whether to Germany or to Safeway. I am so not funny and hysterically funny all at the same time. I am so simple and yet strangly complex. I could live in a tent on a mountain, or in the heart of the inner-city and still love where I am. I am organized and super-messy. I love planning and spontaneous adventure. I am a writer, an artist, a dancer and a dreamer. I love early mornings, late nights, being with friends and being alone. I am beautiful.
I have not already been made perfect, as Philippians 3 says, but I press on to take hold of that for which Christ Jesus took hold of me. With joy and overwhelming peace I echo 1 Corinthians 15, "By the grace of God I, Ashley Lynn, am what I am." I rebuke the lies that attempt to trip me, confuse me, and kill me. I throw off the expectations that tell me who I am supposed to be and how I am supposed to act. I put on reckless abandonment to be whom Jesus calls His beloved. I am fully satisfied in my identity in Jesus and I hunger and long to have more and more of Him in my life that I might become more and more who He created me to be.
"In the world to come, I shall not be asked, 'Why were you not Moses', I shall be asked, 'Why were you not Zusya?'" ~Rabbi Zusya
posted by Ash-Am at 10:13 PM
2 Comments:
You forgot to mention that you're amazing..
this verse came to mind....
Phillipians 4:11-13
I am not saying this because I am in need, for I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do everything through him who gives me strength.
LOVE YOU!
Post a Comment
<< Home